Everyone is Crazy Here O.o

I’m tired of being cut down if fucking cheer. Everything I do. So lets start with just cheer

1. I know that in the begining I SUCKED, even now I am still not the best but I am not horrible. I am sharp, I do facial(fianlly), and I actually look like I want to be there. Yet, I am always in the back. What the fuck?! Caoch told my grandma that she forgets about me, but I am in her face now. People can’t use that I am tall because LeeAnn is just as tall as I am.
2. I KNOW I am good at stunting. It is the ONLY thing I am confident about. I can base and I can backstop(I could fly if they would fucking let me try but I’m to”tall”) and yet I still get cut down. Stunt dosn;t go up”nikkie” stunt falls(yet I catch her) “nikkie” its anoying. I know what the fuck I am doing! Seriously. It is ALLL of our faults. I am not saying I do nothing wrong because I have off days just like everyone else.
3. In stunting, they laugh and laugh and LAUGH. Stop fucking laughing! We aren’t getting it up because you are fucking laughing. Seriously I get laughing before the stunt but while we are in the and you start laughing then the stunt falls and I have to catch her, it get annoying and she is fucking heavy.
4. Aw you got hurt? Broke a nail? Suck it up. I suck it up EVERYDAY. Iget hurt just as much as you do(or even more) so stop it. I do the same thing as you and you are on the fucking floor saying ow? Seriously get the fuck up and lets move on. Say you are tired of doing stunts? Then be serious about it and we might get something done. Seriously.

So coach can you at least fucking tell me what I am doing wrong so I am NOT in the back anymore? I feel and look like a fucking loser since I am not in the front for ANYTHING. I’m not even in the middle of the back, I am off to the side and in the way back. At least fucking tell me what I am doing wrong. I’m tired of crying over this. I am done trying. Since no matter what I do it isn’t good enough. So when the fliers fall on their faces and you actually have to catch them and pay attention, you’ll know why.